Off the Shelf: Revolting Recipes

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When I was in second or third grade, my aunt gifted me a copy of Roald Dahl’s “Matilda.” It didn’t have anything to do with princesses, so I wasn’t really interested, but I decided to be a good little niece and give it a try.

And oh my.

I was hooked from the first page.

I literally devoured the book.

Then I went hunting for more.

I gobbled up “The BFG,” “The Witches,” “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory,” “James and the Giant Peach,” “The Twits,” and I even ravenously consumed Dahl’s autobiographical “Boy.”

Burp.

That’s why I was delighted to find “Roald Dahl’s Revolting Recipes,” a quasi-cookbook published in 1995 by Scholastic and written by Dahl’s second wife Felicity and, wonderfully, illustrated by Quentin Blake.

The cookbook is filled with imaginative interpretations of some of the many foods that appear in Dahl’s books. When you consider the sheer number of candies in “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory” alone, it’s a wonder how they chose which to feature.

Today, I’m selecting several of the recipes that struck a chord with me.

For instance, snozzcumbers. I mean, who can forget snozzcumbers from “The BFG”? The odious and sickening vegetable that the amiable giant had to eat because he didn’t want to guzzle humans like his bone-crunching kin.

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Another that I flipped over was Bruce Bogtrotter’s Cake from “Matilda.” Remember how the Trunchbull made that poor thieving boy eat the entire confection in front of the whole school? Then she smashes the plate on top of his head when he victoriously takes the last bite? Classic.

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There are a ton of candies from “Charlie and the Chocolate Factory,” such as stickjaw for talkative parents.

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And hot ice cream for cold days.

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And carmel apple trees.

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Plus, my favorite. Can you guess what this is? (From “Charlie”)

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There are a number of other recipes from Dahl’s other books. For example, you can make…

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And there’s split pea soup from “The Witches.”

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And Bunce’s doughnuts from “The Fantastic Mr. Fox.”

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These are just some of the gobbldygood foods that will go kerplunk in your tummy most splasheriffically when you eat them. All I have to say is wondercrump!

QUESTION OF THE DAY

What is the most revolting food you’ve ever eaten?

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